Mistake
by AppleSodaPie
Summary: Lily and Sirius both get some devastating news, but before they can tell James he leaves school, leaving Sirius and Lily to comfort each other...LE, JP and SB triangle
1. Chapter 1

Mistake

Chapter 1:

"James!"

A frantic Sirius bounded up the stairs that lead to the head boys room, bursting through the door, he suddenly stopped. Instead of finding his best friend, he had stumbled upon the weeping form of Lily Evans. Lily was sitting on James's bed in a pair of black boxers (James's) and a small, white tank top. At the sight of her scantily clad form, Sirius could not stop an unwanted thought flit across his mind, _God she's bloody gorgeous!_ Sirius shook himself to try and rid himself of this thought and walked across the room to Lily. "What's the matter Lils and where's James?"

Lily jumped slightly, obviously she had not heard him approach. She looked up at him with red, puffy eyes and sobbed, "M-my p-p-parents are d-" but she could not finish the sentence, instead a fresh wave of tears fell from her beautiful green eyes. Sirius understood straight away, he had heard of the latest attack on a group of muggles, obviously Lily's parents had been unfortunate enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. He sank down, next to Lily, onto James's bed. He put one arm around are shaking form and pulled her tight against him.

For and hour this was how the pair remained. Then Lily pulled herself up and looked up at Sirius, "What was it you needed to speak to James about? He left a note explaining where he is. His parents are moving house and he's gone to help them, he's going to be gone all weekend. Is there anything I can help you with?" She looked up hopefully at Sirius, but he hung his head, too ashamed to meet her eyes.

"My brother, Regulus, I've just got some bad news about him,"

Lily stared at Sirius and then timidly asked, "Is he...um..." To her shock Sirius let out a harsh bark of laughter.

"No, he's not dead if that's what you mean. It's much worse than that. He's become a Deatheater." Lily gasped and sat up straight.

"But...I don't understand, isn't he still at school?" Sirius turned slowly to look at her and nodded.

"Lily, most of the Slytherins are either Deatheaters or their parents are. I just never expected Regulus to be stupid enough," a sad smile formed on his face, "my parents will be so proud of him." Lily didn't know how to respond, she had always heard James and Sirius talking of Regulus and how much the disliked him, but she had never thought about the possibility of him becoming a Deatheater and from the sound of it, neither had they. Suddenly she felt a surge of pity for Sirius, he had fought so hard not to become like the rest of his family and now, it was clear from the look on his face that he was worried all his efforts would be for nothing. She gently turned his head, which had turned away from her again, to face her.

"Sirius, listen to me and you listen good. You are nothing like Regulus, or any other member of your family! You are a good person, do you hear me?" Sirius opened his mouth to protest but Lily carried on, "I may think that you can be an arrogant prat sometimes," at this they both smiled, "but you are a good person. If you don't believe me, think of what you've done for Remus. You've risked imprisonment so that he won't be lonely during the full moon. Now tell me, does that sound like the action of a future Deatheater?" Lily broke off and stared expectantly at Sirius, but instead of a response he merely stared at her.

Lily felt a blush creep onto her cheeks and she noticed that lock of silky black hair had fallen into Sirius's eyes. Trying to relieve the intensity in the room she reached up and brushed the lock away. As she leant closer, she caught a scent that reminded her of James, clean with the faint smell of the forest. Suddenly her eyes filled again at the thought of James and a feeling of longing tugged at her heart. She wanted James to be here right now, she wanted him to take her in his arms and comfort the way only he knew how to. A thought crossed her mind as she stared up at Sirius. _He's the closest thing to James that I have right now._ At the same time Sirius was thinking. _She's the closest thing to James._ With these thoughts in their minds Sirius leant slowly towards Lily, looking intently at her lips and Lily didn't pull away.

Hahaha cliffie. I want at least 5 reviews before I post the next chapter! Will Lily and Sirius realise what their doing is wrong...or not? Will James ever find out? Keep reading to find out!

Nilla976

x x x


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Ok i took pity on the three people who bothered to review! Here's the next chapter, hope you enjoy it!

_Lily's POV_

Lily woke to find the sun shining through the window, shifting she realised she was wrapped in strong arms. _Thank God, last night was just a horrible dream, my parents are still alive and James is still at school_. Turning over she lay her head on the broad, well toned chest lying beside her. Her whole body suddenly became rigid, unless James had taken to fake tanning the night before, the chest her head was currently lying on did not belong to him. A wave of understand crashed over her, last night had not been a dream, just to be certain Lily allowed her eyes to slowly travel up the body beside her and met the eyes that belonged to...

_Sirius's POV_

Sirius woke up, disturbed by someone moving in the bed beside him. Slowly he peeled open one of his eyelids and looked down at the small person beside him. Quickly he opened the other eyelid and stared at the shifting form, was he imagining this, or was he lying next to the naked form of his best friends girlfriend. _Did last night really happen, or am I still dreaming? If so, why the fuck am i dreaming about James's girlfriend!_ Before he had a chance to ponder this notion, he felt Lily's body become rigid and saw her head slowly move upwards, towards his own. When her eyes fell on his face a look of horror filled her eyes and Sirius new that she was thinking the same thing he was. Their eyes locked and for a moment, which felt like eternity to them both, icy blue eyes stared into emerald green as they both tried to take in the severity of their situation. The only thought that crossed their minds was _SHIT!_

Soz i know it's short but the next chapter will be up soon, so you won't have to wait long to find out how they handle it!

Nilla976

x x x


	3. Chapter 3

Last Chapter:

Their eyes locked and for a moment, but which felt like eternity to them both, icy blue eyes stared into emerald green as they both tried to take in the severity of their situation. The only thought that crossed their minds was _SHIT!_

Chapter 3:

After finally turning away from one another, to ashamed of themselves to stare at the only other person who knew the awful truth, Lily quietly slipped from the bed. Sirius diverted his eyes, thought the temptation to look and see if she really was as amazingly beautiful as he remembered was strong. Lily slipped on a shirt of James's, which was handily lying over a chair by his bed and found the boxers she had been wearing the night before that had somehow ended up on James's desk. Removing the boxers Lily unearthed a picture of herself, James and Sirius grinning like fools at the camera. She quickly diverted her eyes and pulled the boxers on and headed quickly towards the door. When she reached the door, she turned and looked at Sirius who was now standing wearing his boxers, opening her mouth to say something, she quickly closed it as a blush crept up onto her cheeks and wrenched to door open. She then fled to the safety of her own room, a few moments later she heard the portrait hole close and sighed in relief.

Lily could not shake the feeling that she was covered all over in dirt and so made her way towards the bathroom and ran the taps for a bath added lots and lots of bubbles. Once the bath was full, she removed the shirt and boxers, trying hard not to think about who they belonged to and sank into the warm bath, hoping that the water would cleanse her mind as well as her body and make her forget the previous night. Much to Lily's misery thoughts about her and Sirius kept flitting across her mind, until she could not take it anymore. Rising from the bath she decided that the only way she was going to keep her sanity would be to talk to Sirius. That way they could sort out this hole mess. Resolving to find him after breakfast, Lily changed and headed down to the Great Hall.

What with the excitement of the previous night, Lily had not thought about the death of her parents, but now she did. Surprisingly, no tears came to her eyes. Lily thought about this and realised that she had actually made her peace with her parents death a long time ago. Voldemorts random attacks on muggles had been growing in frequency and somewhere deep inside Lily had always known that someday it would be her parents. Lily found herself bitterly wishing that it had been Petunia as well, but quickly reprimanded herself. With her parents gone, Petunia was all the family Lily had left and so she must make the most of it, however bad their relationship was.

When Lily reached the Great Hall, she was shocked to find so many people there so early on a Saturday morning, she had hoped for some peace to thing over what she would say to Sirius whwn she found him. Shaking her head at her misfortune, she made her way to the Gryffindor table and sat down to her friend Mia Davids. Mia and Lily had been friends since first year, when they had both fallen victim to many of the Marauders pranks. In contrast to Lily's fiery beauty, Mia was much plainer, yet just as beautiful. She had long dark brown hair and gorgeous honey coloured eyes. Her gentle nature balanced out Lily's fiery temper perfectly. It was a well known fact that she and Remus Lupin, a Marauder and best friend of both James and Sirius, were mad about each other but neither was brave enough to make the first move.

As Lily sat down Mia smiled at her, "You look like you could do with some coffee, you and James have a long night?" and she winked at Lily. At the mention of James's name Lily stiffened and averted her eyes from her friends.

"Actually James isn't here this weekend, he had to go help his parents move house." With this Lily poured herself a large mug of coffee and took a long, appreciative sip, hoping that Mia would drop the topic, but unfortunately for Lily Mia did not.

"So why do you look so shattered? Don't tell me you stayed up all night revising, coz we've still got months before the exams Lils!" Mia smiled, thinking that her friend had simply been hard at work all night, and actually she wasn't far off.

Lily decided to tell Mia about her parents, hoping that this would be explanation enough, "I got an owl last night from the Ministry," at these words Mia's face fell knowing what was coming next, "my parents were killed two days ago by Voldemort." Lily was forced to break off by Mia's enormous bear hug.

"Oh Lily I'm so sorry! How are you handling it so well?" Lily was explaining to Mia, when the door of the Great Hall opened to reveal Sirius and Remus. After leaving the Heads common room, Sirius had gone back to his dormitory hoping, like Lily, to find an empty space, where he could contemplate the previous night. Unfortunately he had encountered a wide awake Remus who had insisted he come down to breakfast with him. Remus had not asked any questions about Sirius whereabouts the night before, all to used to his night-time exploits and not wishing for details. When they entered the Great Hall Sirius immediately noticed Lily sitting at the Gryffindor table and worst of all she had spotted him. Once again their eyes locked, but Sirius was forced to look away by Remus tugging him towards the very place he did not want to go.

When Lily saw Sirius, she realised that if they did not speak soon then she would lose her nerve and never do it, so when he and Remus sat down across the table from herself and Mia she forced herself to speak to him. In a voice, which she was pleased to find sounded normal, Lily addressed Sirius.

"Morning Sirius, hey your good at transfiguration right?" at this Remus smiled a knowing smile at Sirius and answered for him.

"Yeah, Lily he's good alright, but then again he should be, he's had enough practice!"

Confused Lily carried on, "I was wondering if you could explain something to me after breakfast, I'm having trouble with the essay we were set for Tuesday."

Sirius looked staright at Lily and replied, "Sure, how about we go down to the Quidditch (sorry if i spelt that wrong) pitch. Down there I can show you the spell without being interrupted." Both he and Lily silently gave themselves a pat on the back for their natural performances. Once they had finished their breakfast, Sirius and Lily proceeded down to the Quidditch pitch in uncomfortable silence. It was only once they had reached the pitch that Sirius turned to Lily, looking at a point just past her ear he asked,

"So...um...how are you coping...you know...about your parents," he broke off looking unusually uncomfortable and Lily looked down at the grass.

"I think I'd already come to terms with the fact that this would happen, so I actually feel relief more than anything else. I know that sounds terrible, but now i know longer have to worry, the worst has happened. Do you understand?" She found herself looking at Sirius, hoping that this would break the ice.

"I get it completely. I think i feel the same way about Regulus. One of our family was bound to join _him _one day, at least now i don't have to wonder when and who." He shifted his focus to her eyes and in that moment a look of understanding passed between them. Then they both remembered what they were really there to discuss and they both looked away, embarrassed.

"So," Lily began but was cut off by a familiar voice yelling her name. She turned to see James running at full speed across the pitch. Suddenly all thoughts of Sirius and her parents left her mind and all she saw was James and she ran towards him. When they reached each other he picked her up and twirled her around and kissed her passionatley.

"Oh God i missed you last night." He whispered in her ear once they stopped for breath. Lily smiled happily at him and asked,

"What are you doing back early? Your note said you'd be gone until Sunday!"

"I missed you too much and mum and dad got sick of my 'moping' so they sent me back." He broke off to kiss her again and then scooped her up. "I can't wait anymore, I'm taking you up to my room and showing you just how much I missed you." With this he turned towards Sirius and winked, "Sorry mate but you understand, I'm sure you were with someone last night, now it's my turn." With a good humoured laugh he set off for the castle, carrying Lily in his arms. Leaving Sirius standing alone in the middle of the pitch. Lily was so engrossed in James she didn't even glance once at him. Sirius watched as they disappeared through the castle doors and was surprised to find a strange feeling in his chest. _Yeah mate, _he thought bitterly, _i was with someone last night...and now it's your turn!_

Ha ha ha, keep reading to find out what happens next!

Nilla976

x x x


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

It was only afterwards, lying contentedly in James strong, if slightly pale arms that Lily spared a thought for Sirius when James asked, "So how come you and Sirius were together?" Lily tensed and gasped.

"W-what? We...um...what do you mean, Sirius and I weren't together..." Lily broke off, unsure of what to say to explain herself.

James laughed at Lily's odd behaviour, "Yes you were, on the Quidditch pitch. Was I really that good that I made you forget?

Lily let out a long breath of relief, "Oh then hahaha, um he was just helping with me with something for Transfiguration, you know how useless I am at it! How did you know where we were anyway?"

James smiled down at her, "Remus told me, said you and Sirius had gone off down to the pitch but i didn't wait to hear what for. Which reminds me, i should go and find the them soon, Moony will be going to the hospital wing soon and I wanna go make sure he's alright." With that he slid out from under Lily's head and crossed the room towards the ensuite bathroom. Lily kept a frozen smile on her face until the door closed and then let it change into a look of pure panic. _He's going to find out, he'll go and find Sirius and then he'll figure it out and then he'll punch Sirius and then he'll come and break up with me! Oh my God I can't breath!_ Lily was now gasping for air and had slid to the floor beside the bed. Trying desperately to stand, Lily grabbed at the bedside table, only to knock off a glass sending it smashing to the floor. The noise caused James to rush out of the bathroom and found Lily hyperventilating on the floor. Quickly he rushed over to her and knelt beside her.

"Lily, Lily look at me. Look in my eyes, Lily concentrate on my eyes and breath, ok? Breath in and out." But this did not help, in fact looking into James's trusting brown eyes made Lily start to cry, which only made it harder to breath. Eventually she managed to calm herself and once her breathing had returned to normal and she had stifled her tears, James looked at her seriously. "Lily, you've been acting strange all night, has something happened? Firstly, forgetting where you were last night and now a panic attack, what's wrong?"

Looking at him, an earnest look on his face, sitting beside her simply loving her, made Lily begin to cry again. She decided to go for the safe option, she needed to speak to Sirius before she could even think about telling James. He pulled her close to his chest and comfortingly stroked her back, "Lils what's wrong? Come on, just tell me, I'm sure we can work it out, whatever it is."

Lily sobbed harder at this and hiccuped, "It's my parents, Voldemort attacked and...hic...they didn't survive." Silently she smacked herself for what she had just done._ Oh God I'm a terrible person. I'm using my parents death to get out of a situation I brought on myself. I'm a horrible, horrible person!_

James pulled her closer towards him and enveloped her in a proper hug. "Oh God Lily I'm so sorry! I had no idea, why didn't you owl me, I'd have come back straight away? How are you coping, not very well by the looks of things!"

Lily looked up at his face and gave him a watery smile, _this is why i love him, he's so amazing, God why'd I have to go and fuck it up so completely?_ But instead she replied, "I didn't want to worry you and besides I'm fine,"

James interrupted her at this, "Yeah that's why your sitting here hyperventilating! What do you mean you didn't want to worry me, Lily you know you can tell me anything right?

At this Lily looked away, _Does he know? Oh lord, why is he so understanding, can't he just be a bastard and make this whole thing easier?_ She forced a smile onto her face and said, "Really, I've known that this would happen for a while, I made my peace with it a long time ago. I guess having you here just makes me think that's all." At this James opened his mouth, with a questioning look on his face. She realised she'd slipped up and he was going to ask what she was thinking about so she quickly continued, "But anyways i don't want to talk about this anymore, ok? I'm fine now really, why don't you go and see Remus and I'll see you tomorrow. Be careful tonight, I don't want...well you know." When he opened his mouth again to ask if she was sure, she went on, "Really I'm fine, now go before I get sick of you!" With a laugh she pushed him back towards the bathroom. He didn't look completely convinced, but went anyway, understanding Lily wanted time alone.

Once he was safely back in the bathroom, Lily quickly left for her own bedroom. Once she had dressed and combed her hair, she left for Gryffindor tower. She would have to wait to talk to Sirius until tomorrow, but she needed to talk to Mia now. _Mia will understand, won't she?_ Butterflies began to creep into Lily's stomach as she gave the Fat Lady the password and slipped up the stairs that lead to the girls dormitory. When she reach the seventh years door, she stopped to take a moment to collect herself and then she heard someone call her name from below.

"Lily," He said it so softly she was surprised that she heard. She turned and looked down over the banister to see Sirius below. "We need to talk." But at that moment the portrait hole opened to reveal none other than James.

Review Review Review! Will he figure it out? Will Lily and Sirius ever get to talk? Read on and REVIEW!

Nilla976

x x x


	5. Chapter 5

Last Chapter

"Lily," He said it so softly she was surprised that she heard. She turned and looked down over the banister to see Sirius below. "We need to talk." But at that moment the portrait hole opened to reveal none other than James.

Chapter 5:

After an awkward moment, which felt like eternity for both Sirius and Lily, they both came to their senses, realising that one of them would have to talk to James. Lily made the decision that it would not be her and with a small smile to James opened the door for Mia's dorm and slid through. Once she was in she through herself across the room and onto Mia's bed. Unfortunately Mia was still in it, so the landing was anything but soft. Laughing Mia's head appeared from beneath the covers and promptly slapped Lily across the head.

"What on earth are you doing here at this time? I wouldn't usually see you before noon at the weekend!" But noticing the look on Lily's face, which could by no stretch of the imagination be called amused, Mia stopped and looked at her seriosuly, "What's wrong? Is it your parents? I thought you said you'd-" but she was cut off by Lily.

"No it's not my parents," at this Lily broke off and looked Mia straight in the eyes, "It's worse."

Meanwhile down in the Gryffindor common room Sirius was left to deal with James, who did not appear to have noticed the tension between his girlfriend and his best friend. Walking over to Sirius with a smile on his face they greeted each other.

"Sorry 'bout last night mate, you understood right?" James smiled over at Sirius who didn't look him straight in the eye, instead concentrating on a cushion, turning it into a flower and then back again.

"Yeah course I do," and changing the subject, "what's the new house like?"

Still smiling James went on to describe the house to Sirius. While these two were downstairs, one thinking all was normal, the other trying as hard as possible to make things feel normal. Lily and Mia were up in the seventh year girls dorm. Lily had just told Mia everything that went on between her and Sirius and was waiting for a response. Mia sat on the bed speechless and then said, "But why? You and James, James and you! Sirius! Why? I dont' understand, Lily, what were you thinking?"

At this Lily thrust herself off the bed and moaned, "That's just it! I wasn't thinking, I was sad and confused and so was he!" Flopping into a chair in the corner of the room, she sighed and kept her eyes glued on the floor, too afraid of what she might see if she looked at her friend.

"What are you going to do? When's James getting back? Have you spoken Sirius yet?"

At this Lily began to sob, "That's the worst of it! That's why Sirius and I went down to the Quidditch Pitch," A look of comprhension dawned on Mia's face and Lily nodded and carried on, "Then James appeared!" Mia gasped, but Lily still would not look her in the eyes, "He came home early, 'coz he missed me," This last bit Lily whispered and then broke down again. Mia got up off the bed and went over to the chair where Lily was sitting.

Bending down Mia looked Lily straight in the eyes and held her gaze, "Does he know?"

Lily, slowly, shook her head, "No, Sirius and I didn't have a chance to talk before he arrived."

"Well, that's not so bad then, you still have time to figure out what to do before you and he, well you know. I mean obviously you won't to yet 'coz of what happened with Sirius, so you can get yourself together, talk to Sirius and then you and James will be alright!" Mia smiled, thinking she had sorted things for Lily and went to get back into bed, but she was stopped by Lily letting out the loudest sob ever.

"For Christ's sake what?" Mia may be sweet by nature, but not in the mornings! "I thought it was all sorted," then Mia understood, "Oh Lily tell me you haven't already slept with him!" When Lily's only response was to sob harder Mia let out a string of swear words. So shocked by this, Lily abruptly stopped crying, she had never heard that sort of language tumble from her friends mouth.

"Mia!"

"Don't you Mia me, Lily Rose Evans! What were you...oh I forgot, you weren't thinking were you?" Lily flinched at the harsh tone in her friends voice.

"P-please don't! I need you right now, I've made probably the hugest mistake of my life and i need my best friend!" Lily broke off and stared up at her friend, her eyes wide, pleading for help.

Mia's face softened, "Oh Lily," she shook her head, "what are you going to do?"

Lily shook her head, "I don't know."

The two friends sat in silence for a while, both thinking of a solution for Lily's predicament. After a short while Mia lifted her head and asked, "This may be a stupid question, but, you don't, what I mean is, you and Sirius, when you...um..._slept_ together, it was purely because you were both confused, right? I mean, there wasn't any feelings there? Lily?" She looked hopefully at Lily.

"NO, no of course not-" Lily broke off and look of confusement on her face, "well-"

Mia interrupted her, "WHAT? So are you going to dump James for _Sirius?_"

Lily looked appalled at this suggestion, "MIA, no it's not that. What I was going to say was, well when I think back on it yeah there was something there, with me and Sirius I mean, but then as soon as I saw James I forgot everything. It was like the world, including Sirius, fell away and it was just me and James. That's got to mean something right?"

Lily glanced at Mia, whose face was not as supportive as Lily was hoping.

"Look Lily, yeah that sounds really nice, you and James I mean. But the fact that you and Sirius had _something_ that night, well you need to address that," when Lily opened her mouth Mia continued, "and I'm not the person you need to be talking with, you need to find Sirius!"

Down in the common room Sirius and James were laughing about something, neither of them could remember what, when Lily appeared in front of them. Once again Sirius felt that odd, burning sensation in his chest and quickly stopped laughing, finding it hard to breath he sat up.

"Hey," Lily openly addressed them both, but would not make eye contact with either," what are you guys doing? Actually thinking about it, I don't want to know." Before James could ask her to do something she carried on, bravely looking into at Sirius, "Can we go somewhere?"

"What?" These words were spoken by both James and Sirius.

Lily calmly smiled at Sirius and continued, "I still need help on that Transfiguration essay, remember?"

Sirius let out a sigh of relieve and smiled at James, "Sorry mate, looks like Hogsmeade (sorry if i spelt that wrong aswell!) is out of the question."

James looked up at Lily, slightly bemused, "You'd rather spend Sunday studying with the git, than with me?

Lily laughed, trying hard not to cry, "Yup, come on _Git_ lets go!" With this Lily lead Sirius out of the common room, both of them laughing at James, left sitting alone on the floor. However, once they were out of the common room Lily quickly dropped Sirius' hand and her smile fell from her face.

"Where can we go? We need to talk now and I don't want James to find us this time!" At these words Sirius raised his eyebrows and Lily realised her mistake, "While we're talking I mean, this time while we're talking."

Sirius smiled at her, but he could not ignore the tight feeling in his chest and could not stop his mind flashing back to the night they spent together. As if she knew what he was thinking, Lily blushed and then coughed, trying to regain her composure.

"So...where can we go?" Sirius thought for a moment and then decided on the Room of Requirement.

Once they reached the corridor, Sirius explained the room to Lily. "What you've got to do is think hard about what you need from the room and then walk past this piece of corridor three times, ok?" Lily nodded and they both followed his instructions. When the door appeared Lily gasped in amazement, Sirius opened it for her and followed her through. When they turned on the light, they were both shocked by what the room had supplied for the...a bed. Not just a bed, a kingsize with silk linen and an assortment of other...goodies.

Hahaha, I promise they will finally talk in the next chapter, and i'll update very very soon. I've finished my GCSE's today so i have all the time in the world now! What will they do? Will they give in once again? Review if you want to find out! I thought this was going to be a one shot fic but now i'm thinking it's going to be really really long, i'm getting new ideas all the time!

Nilla976

x x x


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

Both Sirius and Lily gawped at the objects provided by the room, then Lily suddenly blushed a deep red and slowly made her way over to the bed. Once there she looked at Sirius and said, "Oh my God, this is so embarrassing-" but before she could finish she was cut off by Sirius.

"Shit, Lily I'm so sorry, I can't believe that…wait a minute what were you saying?" Sirius had suddenly noticed the shocked look on Lily's face and then comprehension dawned on both of their faces. The answer was obvious, they had both been thinking the same thing when entering the Room of Requirement. This revelation shocked both of them into silence, but not for long.

"So, what does this mean?" Lily looked over at Sirius eager for a rational explanation to their thoughts, but all she got in reply was a shrug and a small shake of his head.

After a few more moments of heavy silence Sirius turned towards Lily and did something that shocked Lily more than anything that had happened over the previous couple of days, he laughed.

Angry, Lily demanded, "What the hell is so funny?"

Sirius looked into her eyes, flashing with confused rage and could not help but laugh all the more. He quickly sobered up when he received a hard blow to the back of the head. Once he had his laughter firmly under control Sirius explained to a furious Lily.

"Think about it for a moment, Lils. We've both been given terrible news, so we run for the one person who we know will help us and then what do we do? We sleep together, probably the only thing that could make the situation worse, 'cos now whatever we do, tell him the truth or hide it from him we've both totally fucked up the relationships we had with him. Once we figured that out, we tried to figure out the right thing to do now and we end up wanting to repeat the action that got us in this mess in the first place!"

When he broke off he looked up at Lily and realized she was crying, but the tears were of silent laughter rather than crying.

"Oh my God Sirius, your right!" And with this she collapsed on the bed in fits of laughter. After a while both of them managed to control themselves and sat up. The tension in the room had eased considerably and Lily felt more comfortable asking the necessary question, "So, what are we going to do now?"

"I don't know, do you want to tell him?"

At this Lily looked straight at Sirius, "Tell him what? That we slept together, is that all there is to tell him?

Sirius was confused by this, "What else is there to tell him?"

"What else? If we tell him what happened, the first question he's going to ask is if there was anything behind it, or of it was a one time thing."

Sirius looked at Lily as if she was crazy, "Well the answer to that is obvious, it only happened once so that's what we'd tell him!"

"Sirius! Look around us, we both wanted it to happen again when we entered this room! So what does that mean? Do you have…erm…deeper…feelings for…well for me?"

'Do you? Have feelings for me I mean not for you obviously, "With this Sirius broke off abruptly, a hint of colour rising in his cheeks.

Lily closed her eyes and took a deep breath then, very quietly and with her eyes still closed she said, "I don't know."

A flicker of hope spread through Sirius as Lily's words registered, "Well, how can you be sure?"

"Kiss me"

These words made Sirius's eyes widen with shock. Apparantly they had taken Lily by surprise too as she quickly opened her eyes.

"W-what?" Sirius stammered, completely caught off guard.

Lily closed her eyes again and took a deep breath. When she opened her eyes this time there was a determined glint in them and she repeated, "Kiss me."

Sirius didn't need to be told again. Leaning forwards he slipped, one hand around Lily's neck, and pulled her gently towards him. Their eyes met and Lily felt her breath catch in her throat. Then their lips met. After a few moments Sirius pulled away and asked, "Well? Anything?" But before he had even asked, he knew the answer from the relieved look on Lily's face…she obviously hadn't felt what he had.

Lily smiled and shook her head, "Nope nothing, well that's something at least!" She was too caught up by her relief to notice the look of disappointment on Sirius's face.

However, the happy feeling Lily was experiencing did not last for long. She realized that they hadn't resolved the major issue…whether they tell James or not. Turning her face towards Sirius she noticed the serious expression on his face. "Yeah I know," she said in a soft voice.

Sirius looked at her in surprise, _She knows! Shit what do I say now?_

But he didn't have to worry for too long as Lily carried on, "Do we tell James about the other night or not?"

Silently Sirius heaved a sigh of relieve, she didn't know, or even appear to suspect how he felt about her. Realising that Lily was waiting for a response he forced a smile onto his face and replied. "Well, I don't think we should tell him-"

Lily interrupted him, "Yeah you're right, I mean what good will it do? He'll only get upset and think that there's something going on with us, which of course there isn't!"

Sirius felt like he had been punched in the stomach, but instead of showing this, he forced himself to laugh, "Yeah that's right. Of course there isn't anything going on, that kiss just proved that we feel absolutely nothing for each other and obviously the other night was just a stupid mistake!" Speaking those words caused him so much pain, but he didn't let it show.

Lily smiled, "Right, so we won't tell him. Agreed." With this she rose from the bed and said, "Well now we've got all the sorted, I'm going to go and find Mia." At the door she turned around and asked, "You coming?"

Sirius looked up at her and shook his head, "No, I'm gonna stay here for a while."

Lily gave him an odd look and then shrugged, "All right, see you later then." Then, flashing him a smile she left the room, leaving behind a dejected Sirius alone on the bed.

_Sirius POV_

_How could she not have felt that? I know I wasn't imagining it, she definitely kissed me back…didn't she?_

Just outside the Room of Requirement, Lily leant against the wall, fighting back bitter tears. She'd managed to keep a smile on her face whilst with Sirius, but the pain was too much now she was on her own. She'd lied to Sirius when she claimed she hadn't felt anything, but she knew that was the right thing to do. This way she and James could go on as normal and it had been obvious that Sirius hadn't felt anything when they kissed, otherwise why did he pull away? Sure she had done the right thing, but heart broken all the same by the blatant rejection, Lily pulled herself together and walked back to the Gryffindor common room.

Hey guys! Sorry I haven't updated in soooooooo long! My computer crashed and then when I got it up and running again I couldn't remember where I had been going to take the story, so sorry if this chapter isn't as good as the others! But it is longer so that should make you happy right? Well anyhow I'm gonna try and update either later today or tomorrow and get on to the interesting part of the story, I know it's dragging a bit right now!

Nilla976

x x x


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